Unbelievable. It's been a little over a year since I posted. And let me tell you, a lot can happen in a year....
Looking back, a lot of good things happened: I changed jobs, my daughter got married, had some AWESOME girlfriend time and hubby time. And then, some not so good things: stress from changing jobs (but no regrets) my father-in-law got (and remained) ill, financial whoa's. A lot going on and not a lot of attention being paid to my own well-being. Eating/drinking poorly caused another diverticulitis flare-up (which is NOT pleasant). I've used excuse after excuse as to why I've been lazy.
To say that I am disappointed in myself is an understatement. It's difficult to put into words how I feel about gaining so much of the weight back. It used to be food that I would think of the minute I wake up. Now, it's "how could you have put this much weight back on?" It's SO depressing. Do I need therapy? Hypnosis? Surgery? Have my jaw wired shut?
I am so tired of trying to get into clothes that once fit, that I love. I'm not happy having to shop for bigger clothes (again). I hate the way I look (again). I hate not having a lot of energy (again).
So what needs to happen?? I need to get off my ass and get moving again. I need to track, track, TRACK all of the food I am eating (not just what fits within my points). Up my water intake. Make better choices. It all starts NOW. Well, it started yesterday.
Up at 4:15, elliptical for 20 minutes - 2 days in a row! Working on 10,000 steps a day again. Tracking EVERYTHING ~ the good, the bad and the ugly. I've been searching high and low for a Pilates or Barre class that fits into my schedule. I MISS those classes. It's all a start. We all have to start (or re-start) somewhere. That I am choosing to start at the beginning of the holiday season MIGHT be a mistake. Or it might be a blessing. To not have my head screwed on tightly at the beginning might just make this "situation" worse.
For several months, I have "played" with the same pound. Up and down. For. Months... Fingers crossed that this week will be the beginning of my downhill slide.
