Wednesday, April 6, 2016

I Can Feel My Heartbeat

Heart pounding, mind racing, head screaming, sweating - all of these I experienced only moments before the end of my work day yesterday.  Anger.  Anger does serious things to your body.  When you are in tune, you notice how certain emotions affect you.  I knew my blood pressure was probably sky high.  

I had every intention of coming home and working off my bad afternoon.  I even told my boss as I was leaving that I was going home and exercising to de-stress.  And yet, I found myself wandering around in my kitchen when I walked in the door, reverting to my old ways, looking for something to eat.  I had to stop myself and rewind.  Was I really hungry or was I wanting to eat my feelings?  I had just had an apple. probably wasn't hunger.  I walked out of the kitchen and got on the elliptical.  And for 30 minutes, I lost myself in the rhythm of the exercise and watched TV.  I regrouped and let go.  And just like that, I felt better. And when those 30 minutes were over, I went upstairs, away from the kitchen and had my favorite go-to 1 point snack (popcorn).

During my walk after dinner, I was thinking to myself that I need a way to deal with angry situations differently.  But how?  Meditation?  Prayer?  Breathing exercises?  There's got to be a better way than to yell, scream, and/or complain. I don't think I need anger management because I really don't get this angry often. But for those times that I do, I have got to handle it differently.  I guess this is my next challenge for myself.  

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